Believe me when I say I'm sorry

So a few nights ago, I was hanging around the Reub after closing, and these two shady characters sidled up and asked if I could spare a cigarette or two. "Sure," I said--I was in a good mood, and I've been watching my intake, anyway. So these guys and I smoked and talkd for a while, and ended up hitting it off.

"What're you guys up to now?" I asked.
They exchanged glances, and then looked back at me.
"What're you up to?" one asked in an obviously portentous voice.
"I dunno, what're yooooou up to?" I was pretty drunk, and I suppose this kind of joke might've made you guys laugh a little, but my new friends seemed a little thrown, especially since I couldn't stop laughing at myself.

After a long pause, we all regained our composure. One of the guys--I think he had a goatee--pulled a small phial out of his coat pocket.
"Ever heard of adrenochrome?" he asked?
"Of course," I replied, as if I wasn't lying.
"You want some?"

I've already mentioned that I was pretty drunk. Long story short, I invited the guys back to my place, dropped some adrenochrome into some Wild Turkey, and threw it back. BAD IDEA.

The next thing I knew, it was 3:30 this afternoon and I was shirtless on the living room floor. I still can't remember a thing, but apparently some crazy shit went down, because the house is a shadow of its former self. I'm showing this to you bros assuming you're going to see it soon anyway; there's no way I can mop this up by Sunday:






I guess I've learned my lesson the hard way. I am NEVER doing drugs EVER AGAIN. I promise, you guys, everything will be back the way it was as soon as possible.

For now, maybe this'll cheer you up:I don't know who took this picture, but they took it with my cellphone and then sent it to my T-Mobile photo album. I had no idea it existed until today (I used the same system to take the above photos). How often do I make this face?