Last Night's Thunderstorm

NY Celeb Sighting #5

Time: Saturday, August 23, approx. 1:30 AM
Location: 8th St and 5th Ave, Manhattan

Chris "Mr. Big" Noth spotted near Greenwich Village, alone and probably intoxicated. He walks like this:

joe america

biden's like the saturn of vp picks. you see it, and you're like, there's a solid, economic decision. it runs ok, it's unpretentious, it's AMERICAN.

there's a certain level of cognitive dissonance seeing OBAMA BIDEN signs, stickers, t-shirts, etc. i got so used to seeing the same signs everywhere for the last year and a half. now i'm like- who's this guy on all our stuff? what's the deal?

i actually didn't see his speech. i heard it was good. lots of attacking mccain on the right issues + introducing a biography = exactly what he had to do. i was in a coffee shop working in ann arbor, sitting right by the window while a socialist was literally on a soapbox, yelling at passers-by. i don't know what would have been more enjoyable- watching this crazy guy, or the next vp- but i didn't have headphones so the choice was sort of made for me.

anyway, that's the update ON THE GROUND.

In case you haven't seen this...

A young Panda Bear eat his own shit. Adorable!

For the boys

Wet from rebirth

So I went to the optometrist this morning.

The visit started out normal enough. Dr. Goodflesh (actual name) plucked me from the waiting room and ran me through the usual tests (One, or two? Okay, now, one, or two?), and asked me polite, superficial questions about my life.

Then he got out the eye-dilating drops and everything changed.

"The college students like this part," he said, as he turned out the lights and flipped on a small machine that sent hundreds of green points of life spinning tranquilly about the room. "Do you prefer the solar cloud, or deep space?"


I opted for deep space. Before leaving the room to pour me a cup of coffee, the good doctor hit play on a small stereo: Yanni. "Think deep thoughts," he said tranquilly "your eyes should be ready in a few minutes." I can say definitively that this was the best Yanni listening experience of my life.



As my eyes dilated, the points of light broadened, lost focus. It was as if I was moving ever closer to them, until I had left Earth behind, and was suddenly, beautifully alone, dancing with the stars (ha ha!).

Five minutes later, he came back to run more tests, and everything was back to normal. The lights switched on, the music off. He showed me what my cornea looked like and then introduced me to his optician. I ordered frames that look eerily similar to all the frames I've ever ordered, and then I left. How boring life suddenly seemed, having discovered what it is to be a Platonic Soul, soaring, all-knowing, across galaxies, accompanied by no less than the greatest pianist of the 20th century.

If I seem more introverted, more aloof than when you last saw me, be not surprised; I am dreaming of a better place.

One Last Thing For Aaron

The Office Wins Forever

It seems like the only group of people more self-referencing than my group of friends (I LUV U AAALLLLLL!) is the cast of the office.




http://freejennanow.com/

PS:: PAM/JENNA--went to my sister's high school. BOO YA!

Non-Lil Wayne Related Post

Has everyone been Rick Rolled at some point in their lives?
http://ca.youtube.com/watch?v=65I0HNvTDH4

ok I couldn't resist, I can't wait for this to come on at a Sayles dance
http://ca.youtube.com/watch?v=hTdDahpe2Ag

i have no feeling

The most recent "sponsored poll" on the facebook.

Do you like the country of Brazil?

__ Yes!! This is the heaven on earth!! I love it!!
__ Well, I have no feeling toward it whatsoever.
__ No, I stay from everything from the country

Do they know I read Leah's blog??? Was this written by a non-English speaker? Is facebook now "the man"?

The Shitting Intern

Now that everybody's internships or whatever are winding down, here is a story to put your experience in perspective.

Olympic ANTM?

So I'm watching the US women's volleyball game this morning and the announcers said that one American player, Kim Glass, has tried out for ANTM 5 times.


I don't know how I feel. On one hand, I don't think she would be a good model, but it would be mighty entertaining to watch an Olympic athlete interact with the rest of the contestants. Btw, new cycle begins in 2 weeks.

BOOYAH

BOOYAH!!!

I told Caitlin and Lanaya that I had a special study break planned for them. Then I showed them "2 girls 1 cup." Now Lanaya needs to go to confession-- actually. Whoops! Jews ruining things for Catholics all over again.

PS: Michael Phelps is a freak fish. Fuckin' freaks.

It's 6:30 in the morning. Do you know where your child is?

A fucking airport.